(It seems like I’m making a habit of early-morning blogging. One more thing I need to change for next year.)
Version 2.0 of the end occurred last night and tonight. I don’t even know where to start. We’ll go chronologically.
My night started off with the marching band banquet. While I couldn’t stay for the whole thing, I enjoyed my time while I was there. Just being in that room with everyone made me feel so… comfortable. Seeing some of the costumes just made me love this group of people that much more. SV was a unicorn, HW and VS went as an old married couple. I won the Nicest Hair award and got a hairbrush. Funny thing is I actually needed a new hairbrush. They know me well, haha. When we took our high winds family photos, it finally hit me that not everyone would be returning next year. Having to say goodbye was difficult.
ACF Banquet. I missed the entire first half, including the frosh video so the rest was just casual entertainment for me. The presentations were incredibly adorable and very sweet. Worship was great as always, except for the fact that I sang when I was supposed to be resting my voice. Let’s pray that God heals me in time for jury. Pictures came after. Chaos as usual, as pictures in huge groups always create. This all happened in a flash. What really stuck in my mind was the casual sharing and spontaneous worship that followed at House 28. Being able to just relax and listen to all these brothers and sisters share made me feel so calm and so… comfortable, like with the band. For those 3 hours, I actually felt like I had nothing to worry about. All these people around me? They had my back. They would forever be my prayer warriors and the people who would take care of me no matter what. When MY asked to pray for all 5 of us frosh that were present, I just… it was so… I can’t even describe it. I forgot about all the things I screwed up on this year. I forgot about how I had 3 exams to write that I knew absolutely nothing for. I forgot about the stress of having to find a subletter before I left London for the summer. Having Rere put her hand on my arm as she prayed for me, it meant that much more that it was HER praying for me. In that moment, I forgot about the world. It was just us in that living room. I felt so calm and so loved. Not a care in the world, not a worry in my heart. Leaving that environment was also one of the hardest things to do. But it had to happen and here I am, back in my state of worry and self-doubt. It was an amazing night and I never want to forget a moment of it.
Then tonight, our studio party. I’ve never felt more comfortable with these people before tonight. We ate, we laughed, we sang, together. It was the most fun I’ve had in this group setting, ever. I didn’t feel like a measly first year, unknowing and young. Well, I did feel young, but I finally felt like I belonged with these people. That I had made it thus far. It hurt to know that tonight would be the last time I’d see some of these ladies but I’m glad we got to spend this one last night together. When we sang For Good, I just teared up as I saw them hugging each other. I can’t imagine having to be in their position. It’ll be the third time. But it will come. Sigh, it will come.
I’ve had an eventful few days and while I’m exhausted, I’m incredibly grateful that I got to experience these moments with the people that were there. Praise the Lord for all that He has done is wonderful and good.